


Hold Onto Me (cuz I'm a little sleep deprived)

by Mrs_Understood



Series: College is strange, Tony Stark is stranger. [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Has Issues, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Insomnia, M/M, Natasha Romanov Has Issues, Nightmare, Sleep, Tony Stark Has Nightmares, sleeping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-15
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-02-24 21:48:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22264984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mrs_Understood/pseuds/Mrs_Understood
Summary: No one in this AU is okay or talking about there issues, so their subconscious takes matters into there own hands. Basically a huge dump of nightmare one-shots. Expect massive hurt comfort, angst and teeth rotting fluff (if I feel nice ;) ) Will be updated depending on the speed of my AUSPOILERS FOR COLLEGE AU PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION
Series: College is strange, Tony Stark is stranger. [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1562074
Comments: 21
Kudos: 74





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So basically this is a nightmare fic thing, and I will be releasing chapters as I reach the point in the AU so I have written a bunch of this, but I need to get there in the AU so I don't spoil like, major major plot points, hope you understand :) That being said, enjoy this absolute garbog dump of hurt comfort <3

_ Loki stood at the edge of the building, the wind whipping his hair around him viciously, making his skin’s porcelain tone stand out against the stormy sky. _

_ “Loki, come down from there,” Thor called. “You hate storms. Let’s go inside.”  _

_ Loki turned around, allowing Thor to see his brothers face. It was not the face of Loki as a teenager, but as he was when he was young-maybe eight or 9- contorted in fear. It made his heart drop to see his brother looking so young and afraid.  _

_ “Loki…” Thor said carefully.  _

_ As he spoke his brother started inching closer to the edge, making panic rise in the blondes chest.  _

_ “Please Loki, come back in.”  _

_ “I’m sorry, Thor,” Loki whispered, his voice hoarse.  _

_ Thor ran towards Loki, hoping to get him to safety, but the closer he ran, the farther Loki tipped until they reached a stalemate.  _

_ “Please! Don’t do this!” Thor screamed over the wind, which was blowing hard enough to make him feel a little unbalanced, making him worry for his slim brother.  _

_ “Goodbye,”  _

_ With the first crack of thunder, Loki tipped over the edge of the building, allowing his small body to be picked up by the wind. Thor did not make it to the edge in time to see what happened, but he heard a horrid thud and then silence.  _

Thor bolted upright in bed, heart racing. Loki. He needed to find Loki immediately. He started to get out of bed, when something stopped him. He looked down, seeing his brother asleep. Well, mostly. 

“Tho’?” Loki asked, his voice slurred with sleep. 

Loki had a bad habit of dropping off his ‘R’s when he was tired. Thor let out a shaky breath, wrapping his arms around his brother.

“Izzere somethn wron’?” 

“No. No, Loki. Go back to sleep. Everything’s fine,” he said, rolling slightly to press his body against Loki’s. 

“Thor, wasswrong?” Loki asked, trying to squirm away instinctively. 

Thor tightened his grip on his brother, keeping him in place. 

“Ow.”

“Sorry,” Thor said, keeping his voice as steady as he could. 

He knew that Loki was okay. His brother was right in front of him, trying to maintain some semblance of personal space. Except that there was a piece of his mind that made him worried. Maybe his dream was real somehow, some kind of memory… or prediction. 

“Thor, what happened?” Loki asked, squirming around again. 

“Nothing, just a bad dream. Go back to sleep,” Thor insisted, loosening his hold on Loki microscopically. 

“M’kay. Night, Thor,” Loki said, satisfied with the answer as he curled closer to Thor. 

It always made him smile how clingy his brother was. Loki would never admit it now, but he loved hugs. Thor grabbed onto the back of Loki’s shirt, taking comfort in the warmth coming from his brother. He closed his eyes, trying to block out the image from his nightmare out of sheer willpower. He wouldn’t have ever made his way back to sleep before, but with Loki stuck in his bed-for safety reasons-he was able to slip back into sleep.

“Goodnight, Loki.”


	2. Bucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “STEVE!” Bucky screamed before he jumped into the water after them. 
> 
> His vision went dark. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Exactly as angsty as you expect.

_ Bucky ran as fast as his legs would carry him, racing to get to Steve. He was inside his home, in the garage-a usual hang out place as his mom never looked there- running towards the driveway where Steve was standing. Steve seemed completely oblivious to the situation, looking at him in confusion as Bucky's dad stood behind him.  _

_ “Buck? Whats wrong?” Steve asked, looking at him with worry.  _

_ Bucky opened his mouth to talk, startled when he found he couldn’t. Not only could he not talk, he couldn’t breath at all. He struggled, but the more he tried to draw the air in the worse his chest hurt and he was pretty sure he was dying and  _ **_holy shit he was dying and-_ **

_ They weren't at his house anymore. They were out at the lake behind the school that the giant river flowed into, creating a constant current. There was a large wall of brambles that the other kids were too scared to push through. Bucky had thrown his old stuffed rabbit Steve had gotten him shortly after they met (get it, he’s a buck) on accident into the middle of the lake when Steve had tried to get him to do 100 jumping jacks in a row, and he was too heavy to go get it without the ice starting to crack.  _

_ “I’m light enough; it’ll be fine!” Steve said as he continued to inch his way across the ice, wincing as a particularly loud crack came from where he placed the palm of his hand.  _

_ The river hadn’t even frozen over yet. It was flowing to fast, and Bo (his rabbit) had landed near the beginning of the ice ring, meaning the ice would be the thinnest there.  _

_ “Steve! Be careful! You’re gonna fall in! I don’t care about the stupid rabbit!” he called.  _

_ He was about to call Nat, like he had in real life, when the memory shifted.  _

_ His dad was on the ice with Steve now, towering over Steve’s small eleven-year-old form, grinning maniacally.  _

_ “Bucky, I’m coming back whether you like it or not.”  _

_ His voice rang harshly in the winter air and Bucky gasped. It was mechanical as it had been on the voicemail where he had said the same thing a few years ago.  _

_ “Steve!” Bucky screamed, desperate to reach his friend before something horrible could happen.  _

_ He had had the dream enough times to know he couldn’t change it. The events were set like real life, and either way Steve would end up submerged in the icy water, but in this dream… in this dream his father lifted his foot.  _

_ “I’m warning you, James. You’re making this harder than it needs to be,” his father said again.  _

_ “Making what harder?” he asked. “What should I do?”  _

_ In lieu of an answer, his father picked up the heel of his foot, tapping it on the ice, as if to test it. Spiderweb cracks shot though just like they had in real life, although this time it wasn’t Steve who caused them.  _

_ “PLEASE!” Bucky yelled, stepping closer.  _

_ As always, his father didn’t listen, instead using all of his strength to punch his foot though the ice, creating a chain reaction. His dad and Steve fell though at the same time, lost in the black water.  _

_ “STEVE!” Bucky screamed before he jumped into the water after them.  _

_ His vision went dark.  _

Bucky woke up screaming. Instantly he clapped his hand over his mouth, mortified. He cast a sidelong glance at Clint, who was still asleep, sprawled across the bed completely. He let out a shaky breath, although it came across as more of a sob. Even with his eyes open he kept seeing Steve disappearing under the black water. He needed to make sure Steve was okay; then he could go back to sleep. Yes, that would help him. 

He slipped out of his bed, not bothering to put a shirt on. Nobody should be awake, and if they were and were willing to ignore his screaming, he was sure they would turn a blind eye to his partial nudity. He padded down the hallway bearfoot, trying to be as quiet as possible. He had never been very good at being quiet though, and the old dorms boards creaked every time he stepped on one. 

Bucky ran a shaky hand through his hair, now faced with Steve’s dorm. He knew Steve was okay, somewhere in his heart of hearts, but the images felt so real to him right now that it was hard to convince himself otherwise. It had been easier when he was in high school and him and Steve shared a room. The dream didn’t come often, and when it did, he usually woke Steve up unintentionally. It was so comforting to have Steve there, ready to reassure him that yes, he  _ was  _ still breathing, and no, the ice hadn’t frozen over. Still, Steve didn’t know about his dad being a part of the dream. Bucky had never felt the need to share that bit with him. His father had been out of the picture for almost a year by the time he met Steve, and Bucky knew it wouldn’t have made sense to him. 

Sighing, he twisted the handle before he could think anymore, not wanting to freeze in the hallway any longer. As predicted, Steve had fallen asleep quietly. He basically powered off at 8 PM no matter what was happening, and tonight had fallen asleep with a book across his chest and the light on. Being RA, he hadn’t been made to live with a roommate, so there was no one to turn it off. Bucky took the book, not wanting Steve to roll over on it, and sat on his friend's bed, studying his face. 

“Hey, Steve,” he whispered quietly. “I’m sorry to come in here. I, uh, I had the ice dream again, third time this quarter, and I, uh… I wanted to check in on you. I can see you’re safe now, though, so…” 

He should leave. He should leave and go back to bed and maybe get enough sleep tonight. Besides, when Steve woke up with him, Steve would make Bucky get up at the unholy hour of 5:25 to go running with him as payment. That should have been more than enough to deter him from staying… and yet. 

Steve shifted in his sleep, whimpering slightly, which took away any kind of resolve that Bucky had had before. Steve had nightmares, too, although Bucky was never allowed to hear what they were about. Afterwords, Steve always sought out Bucky, waking him up at all times of the night, and it seems cruel to leave him alone to deal with them now. Tiredly, he scooted underneath the light blue comforter, squishing himself between Steve and the wall. 

“Night, Stevie,” he muttered sleepily. 

Steve didn’t wake up, but he did instinctively curl around Bucky's body. Bucky tried to not feel too happy with himself when he heard the whining from his friend stop, each comforted by the other's presence. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAHAHA I'm so sorry


	3. Tony

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy easter! Not my best work but I hope you enjoy! 
> 
> Warning: Tony angst ahead.

_ Tony looked around the room, trying to calm his breathing. It was a dark room, with rough walls and exposed pipes. Probably a basement somewhere. He tried to move, same as he had in his memory, and found his arms bound.  _

_ He’d been too small to fight back in the same way he would have now, he’d only been seven at the time, so while he knew basic self defence already, he wasn’t good at remembering it.  _

_ He shifted, hearing his handcuffs clink together on the back of the chair. He sighed. Handcuffs were much harder to break than rope or tape. And it seemed they had used two, shakling one of his wrists to a pole on the wall, and the other one to the opposite side of his chair. He was completely immobilized, his feet were also cuffed. Together with one set and to a loop on the floor with another.  _

_ This had been planned for a while.  _

_ He tried to remember the man that had grabbed him. At the time he hadn’t panicked. At least not immediately. He’d known him. Why was it he knew him again?  _

_ “It’s awake,” A voice yelled, accompanied with a blinding sliver of light that landed directly over his eye. He shifted, trying to get away from it. Another man clomped down the stairs.  _

_ “Colby!” Tony yelled, looking up at the man. He knew Colby, he’d been the head of security for their family. The man just sniffed at him. That was strange, usually he was much nicer. “I’m locked up. Someone did this.”  _

_ “Yeah, someone did.” The man said, his back still to him. Tony screwed his face up, trying to remember what exactly had happened. A big man had grabbed him, and tried to put a knife to his throat. He’d been in a headlock, and the man missed.  _

_ He turned to look at Colby again. As he did, his neck stung, a sharp deep pain that made him muffle an involuntary yelp. His father had been giving him lessons on how to keep quiet. Colby looked kinda like the man.  _

_ “You didn’t lock me up, did you Colby?” He asked.  _

_ “Col, why’s that kid making so much noise? I thought you said you were gonna gag him.” A gruff voice from above yelled. It sounded female, surprising Tony. Usually it was men who ran kidnappings.  _

_ “His necks were bleeding too bad. Just tune it out!” Colby yelled back.  _

_ “Don’t forget, we gotta scare his ol’ dad, make ‘em look real rough,” The woman called again. Colby smilled, stepping forward with something that looked like a whip in his hands.  _

_ “Colby?” He asked. “What are you- COLBY-”  _

_ \-- _

Natasha walked calmly up the stairs, her hand on the nicked old banister. She’d been in a late class, and unfortunately been asked to lead an even later study group. She’d checked to make sure everyone was in their beds, not wanting to miss some catastrify, and was going to try and drag Tony to his dorm from his lab. She opened the door, straightening up to try and see the surrounding area. 

She finally spotted him in a desk chair, with an old blanket draped across his front. She was tempted to just allow him the time to sleep, but she was pretty sure that if she left him hear something would go wrong. 

“Tony?” She called softly across the lab. He shifted, muttering something in his sleep. At first she just thought about how  _ adorable _ he looked, curled up and with his hair sticking everywhere, but as she stepped closer, it became clear he wasn’t sleeping peacefully. 

“Tony?” She said, this time only two or so feet away from him. He was such a light sleeper, that would have normally woken him up. So, she decided to take her life in her hands and try a more aggressive approach. 

She placed one hand on either soldier, intending to shake him awake, but before she could do so, she found herself on the floor, with no clear memory of falling. Tony was sitting bolt upright in the chair, looking for all the world like a frightened animal. 

She sat up, rubbing her solder, which she had landed hardest on, and asset Tony. He still didn’t seem fully awake yet. 

Or maybe awake was the wrong word. He definitely wasn’t asleep, but his eyes were unfocused and his breathing was coming fast and panicked. 

“Tony,” She said again, showing her hands. She wasn’t exactly familiar with panic attacks, she hadn’t ever had one herself (or one she would admit to) but they did happen to Loki and Clint on occasion. Loki much more often than Clint. 

Tony snapped his eyes, directly locking them on her, and she shifted so she was kneeling in front of him. She tried incredibly hard to not think about how cute it was that they were basically the same height when she did so. 

“Natasha?” He asked after a long pause. She grinned in spite of herself. “Why-” He cleared his throat and started again, not sounding any less panicked. “Why are you on the floor?” 

“Well, I tried to wake you up, and then I was down here.” She said. Tony’s eyes widened-something she hadn’t thought possible if she hadn’t seen it- and he ran a hand through his hair. 

“Shit,” He said, pressing his hands into his eyes. “I’m sorry Nat.” 

“Don’t be. Clint’s woken me up to arrows against my throat, it’s nothing personal.” She said. Tony looked at her through his hands. “Bu-ut, you  _ are _ going to tell me about whatever dream you just had that made you do that.” 

“I… no. Sorry Nat but I can’t.” Tony said, cracking his neck and stretching. “I should get back to-” 

“If you say get back to work, I am going to throttle you.” She threatened. “You can tell me about the dream or I am getting Sam to come up here and phyco-anilyze you.” 

“Don’t bother him,” Tony said with a sigh. “I- Fine.” 

“Fine?” She asked. 

“Fine I’ll tell you, but you can’t flip out over it okay? It’s no big deal, really.” 

“I make no promises.” She said. “Let's hear it.” 

“Okay,” Tony took a shaky breath, pulling his legs up in the chair so he was in a ball. IT all made him look incredibly young. “So when I was little-” 

“You still are.” She said. He glared at her. 

“When I was  _ younger _ , maybe seven or eight, there was an incident. I uh… well I got kidnapped for like, a while. It took a really long time for anyone to find me because of who did it.” 

She looked at him for a minute. “Well who did it? And how long was it til they found you?” 

“Um… here, it’ll be easier if I just show you the article.” Tony said, tapping some disk on his desk with a shaky hand. A moment later, thousands of, what seemed to be headlines, popped up. Tony scanned for a moment before clicking one. 

She skimmed the article, looking at the name and headline of the article so she could find it later. The main points seemed to be that Tony had been held in a basement for several weeks, by the head of security for his father and several other staff members. 

She stared at the photo of him mostly. A before and after. On the left they showed a tiny boy, definitely small for seven, with neatly combed hair, which must have been smothered in gel, having seen him normally, like now, with his hair all over the place. He must have been at some kind of event. His posture was perfect and he was dressed in a tiny tux. According to the photo it was only an hour or so before he had been grabbed. 

The other photo however. 

His face was completely beaten blue. One of his eyes had swollen shut and his hair and face were caked with blood. He only wore an oversized button up shirt, definitely not his own, and we were looking at something behind the camera with fear in his eyes. 

Most disturbing though, where the descriptions of injuries she couldn’t see. Broken ribs and fractured vertebrae. The doctors said he shouldn’t have lived. The consesses on his worst injury shocked her. 

“That’s where you got the scar.” She whispered, looking at the photo closer. You could just make out the bandage behind his left ear in it, not quite covered by his grown out hair. She wasn’t done looking, but Tony closed the window before she could stop him. 

“Yeah. So… that’s it. Can I go now?” He asked. He wouldn’t look her in the eyes, disturbing for Tony. 

“No.” She said. He looked at her in surprise. Or fear? Both? 

“Why not?” He asked, sounding defensive. 

“Why didn’t you look like you were having a nightmare?” She asked. It had been bugging her. 

“I don’t know. It’s not like I can control my face in my sleep.” He grumbled. 

“If you were anyone else I would believe you.” She said. Tony looked at her, before shrugging and trying to stand up. She grabbed his wrist before he could and pulled him onto the floor with her. He went pretty willingly. 

“My dad… he always thought of them as a sign of weakness.” Tony muttered after sitting on the floor in silence for several minutes. “He said if he’d been through wars and kidnappings and didn’t have nightmares I shouldn’t either.” 

She sighed, looking at the young teenager, before grabbing him and pulling him into a hug. He immediately tensed, trying to pull away at first, but she just held onto his shoulders tighter, and eventually he relaxed into it. “I’m sorry Tony.” 

“Eh,” He said, shrugging. “I’m fine now.” 

“Come on,” She said, wiping away what definitely were not tears. “Let’s get you to a real bed.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it! Please comment who else you wanna see, and go check out my two chapter fics if you want more frequent updates.


End file.
